Santa Banta Jokes

Daku bank lutne gaye..
Gun ghar mein bhool gaye

fir bhi bank lut lia

kaise?

Bank manager Santa tha, bola:
koi baat nahi I trust u,
Gun mujhe kal dikha dena.

Santa shaadi mein khana khane gaya

Par samane Salad ka counter dekh kar wapis aa gaya

Baahar aakar bola: O banta, abhi to sabzi hi kat rahi hai

By mistake, Santa goes in to ladies toilet room.

All ladies suddenly stand up!

Santa: Izzat dil mein ho yahi kaafi hai…

Baitho… baitho…!

Santa 1 interview mein,

Sir: Apko kitne saalo ka tajurba hai?

Santa: Sir maaf karna,
maine salo ko to ‘Try’ nahi kiya,
lekin muje 3 saliyo ka tajurba hai! 😛

Santa: how much is my mobile bill ?

Call centre girl: sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status

Santa: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL my MOBILE BILL!

3 Dost picnic par gaye…
Wajah jakar yad aaya ke pepsi to ghar bhool gaye!
To unhone decide kiya ki Santa jaakar pepsi le aaye…

Santa: Main iss shart par jaunga ki mere aane tak tum samosa nahi khaoge
Baaki dono friends: theek hai…

1 din gujar gaya, dono ne socha ki ab samosa kha lena chahiye… Jaise hi samosa uthaya.

Santa ped ke peechhe se nikal kar bola: Dekho agar aisa karoge to main nahi jaunga!

Santa: Oye, tu to Doctor ke paas jaane waala tha, kya hua?

Banta: Yaar kal jaaunga, aaj thodi tabiyat kharab hai….!

Santa school me gadha le ke aaya…

Madam: Ye gadha, Q laye ho?

Santa: Madam aap hi to Kehti ho ke maine bade bade gadho ko insan banaya hai. To maine socha ki ab iski bhi life ban jaegi . 😉

Chalaak Santa!

Surgeon: I am sorry, it seems a rubber glove was left inside you after the operation, We have to operate you again…

Santa: Ro mat, Ye le 20Rs. Naya le lena..!

Daku bank lutne gaye..
Gun ghar mein bhool gaye

fir bhi bank lut lia

kaise?

Bank manager Santa tha, bola:
koi baat nahi I trust u,
Gun mujhe kal dikha dena.

Santa phone par baat kat raha tha!
Banta: Kis se baat kar rahe ho!
Santa: Biwi se..
Banta: Itne Pyar se?
Santa: Tumhari hai..

kidnapar-Teri biwi mere kabze mein hai,
saboot ke taur par uski Do ungliyan bhej raha hun .

Santa-saboot pakka nahi hai, MUNDI bhej MUNDI..

Mom: Sofa letne ke liye nahi hota baithne ke liye hota hai

Son: Ha toh Chappal bhi maarne k liye nahi pehen ne ke liye
hoti hai..

Ek chappl aur padi.

Santa asked Banta: Why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in evening?

Banta: Very simple, because he is PM not AM..

Santa- kal meri shadi hai aur ladki walon ne kum log bulaye hain.

Banta- to isme problem kya hai?

Santa-pata nahi papa mujhe le jaynge ya nahi..

SANTA:Lalaji dettol soap hai,
Lala:ha,
santa:acha vala hai,
Lala:ha,
Santa: achi quality ka hai,
Lala:ha bhai ha,
Santa: thik hai hath dhokar 1kg aata do..
Santa: Sharab pite pite rone laga
Banta: Kya hua kyo ro rahe ho?
Santa: Yaar jis ladki ko bhulane ke liye pi raha tha,uska naam yaad nahi aa raha hai..
Santa -Jab bhi wife mera photo apne mobile se click karti hai mujhe bahut dar lagta hai..
Saala aaj kal OLX aur quikr ki advertise bahut aati hai na ..

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1 Comment


  1. Old jokes pls post new jokes

    Reply

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