Jokes

Bhikhari: Kuchh Khane ko do baba
Aadmi: Tamatar Khao

Bhikhari: Roti hi de do baba
Aadmi: Tamatar Khao

Bhikhari: Laao, Tamatar hi Khila do
Aadmi ki Patni: Yeh totle hain, Keh Rahe hain… Kamakar Khao!!

Pandit ka Tota (parrot) roz 1 admi ko dekhta or bolta,
“aur kameene”!!

Us admi ne pandit se shikayat ki to pandit ne tote to danta…

Agle din jab vo admi tote ke karib se guzra to tota kuch na bola…
thoda aage jake us admi ne mud ke dekha to tota haste hue bola..

“SAMAJH TO TU GAYA HI HOGA”!!

Boy: Mere sath chalogi?

Girl: Kaha?

Boy: Jaha Tum Kaho…

Girl: Ok! Police station Chalte hain…

Boy: Lo batao!! Ab banda apni Behen se mazaak bhi nahin kar sakta!!

Kal kare so aaj kar
Aaj kare so ab..

Kal kare so aaj kar
Aaj kare so ab..

Abey karta hi rahega to dhoyega kab!!

2 lovers were sitting in a park.. eating chips and looking in the eyes of each other

Girl: Jaanu, wat r u thinking?

Boy: Tu mujhse jyada chips kha rahi hai… chatori!!

Wife: Chalo na, Aaj sunday hai, Kahi bahar chalte hain… aur drive main karungi

Husband: Ooh! Matlab jayenge car mein, aur aayenge akhbaar mein!!

Gabbar : Gande..!…
Samba : Tu ganda..!!…
Gabbar : Gande..!…
Samba : Tu ganda..!!…..
Gabbar: Abbe Dhakkan, GUN DE GUN!!
Ghanta Singh road par potty kar raha tha…

Police aayi aur use pakad liya…

Jab police use le jane lagi to Ghanta Singh bola:

“O kanoon ke rakhwalo, yeh Saboot to utha lo”

English Teacher: ‘One cute young girl is walking on the road.’
Change this into an
exclamatory sentence.

Student: “Aaila Item!!!”

Pappu’s dad joins facebook.

Pappu’s update: ‘Dad on FB,wtf !!’

Dad comments : ‘what is wtf?’

Pappu replies :
‘Welcome to facebook’ !!

Pehla Aadmi: Tumhe yeh chhota medal kisliye mila?

Dusra Aadmi: Gaane ke liye

Pehla Aadmi: Aur yeh bada medal?

Dusra Aadmi: Gaana band karne ke liye!!

Teacher: Agar tum ek jungle mein ho aur waha sher aa jaaye to tum kya karoge?

Pappu: Sir, main ped par chadh jaunga

Teacher: Agar wo waha bhi aa jaye to

Pappu: To main paani mein kood jaunga

Teacher: Aur agar woh paani min bhi aa jaaye to?

Pappu: Master ji, Pehle aap yeh batao ki aap sher ke rishtedaar ho kya jo aapki uski side liye jaa rahe ho…

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